Ways That Guys Can Stay Safe, Healthy, and Protect Themselves When Dating
It's always a good idea to stay safe when dating. While we think of this usually as protecting yourself from sexually transmitted diseases or pregnancy, there are a ton of other things to take into consideration too. For instance, just the act of sharing a cab together this past year could have lead to a life threatening illness. As we begin to return to normal and dating resumes it is important to remember that there are other viruses, physical, and emotional dangers to protect yourself from.
This is especially true if you are looking for love online or through an app, because there may be people out there who try to take advantage of you. It doesn't matter how old you are or what gender you identify as - it's important to know the best ways to protect yourself from potential dangers in dating. In this blog post, we will discuss 10 different ways that guys can stay safe and healthy while they're on the hunt for love!
Avoid Providing Too Much Personal Information Before Establishing A Personal Relationship
Unfortunately there are bad people out there and sometimes folks pose as someone other than they are when it comes to dating sites. Personal information can be shared too easily in these situations where one party thinks that a chance at love is on the line.
For instance, avoid sharing a complete birthday, home address, gate code to your building or garage etc. As you develop a personal relationship these details might be important but for right now you want to avoid telling a stranger when you'll be away from home, what stuff you have, and how to get into your building.
Additionally, oversharing of personal information about yourself is also a danger here. Many people can create an opinion of the other party before even meeting so if you've shared too much personal information about family, friends, co-workers, weaknesses, failures, even successes it may warp their perspective of you.
Initial Meetings Should Take Place In A Public Place
Your initial meeting should be in a public space that is well-lit and has other people around you. This could be a cafe, coffee shop, restaurant, or potentially a park where there are people around, it is important that you avoid having the first meeting in a secluded spot. By making sure there are people around, it will protect you from any risk that your "dream girl" might actually be someone who is looking to take advantage of you. It will also help make it easier to end the date early if it is clear that things aren't going to work out.
Another advantage of meeting in a public spot is that it will take some of the pressure off both of you compared to something like a movie date, car ride, or a hike in the woods.
In an ideal situation, both parties will be relaxed and able to open themselves up to conversation as well as exploring the other person to determine if there might be a future. Make sure that your first date is conducive to making that happen.
Avoid Excessive Alcohol Consumption - For You And Your Partner
Be careful with alcohol consumption. Alcohol lowers inhibitions, that's sort of the point of drinking. so if someone is sexually aggressive towards you when drinking it might be easy to say yes without being fully aware of what's happening because you'll feel less in control. This is especially important for men since we can be the victims of women who decide later that they regretted the meeting and accuse the man of inappropriate behavior. While there are men who act too aggressive and others who simply misinterpret the desires and intentions of their partners, when both parties are intoxicated it almost never ends up in the favor of the man.
It is also a good choice to avoid cannabis or other recreational drugs for the same reason. While these intoxicating substances can be good for improving a sexual experience or relaxing so you can become more comfortable with your partner, they can also lead to undesirable situations as well.
Use Condoms Ever Time - Even For Oral Sex
Use condoms even for oral sex - there may not always be a way to tell if someone has an STI like herpes or chlamydia until after sexual activity takes place. These two diseases cannot only cause pregnancy complications and infertility but lead to a stigma in the future of a partner asks if you've ever have a sexually transmitted disease.
Luckily, for men, most of these diseases are treatable, if not curable and others such as HPV are more symptomatic in women. However, you do not want to risk catching or inadvertently transmitting something to your partner.
When it comes ready to take things to the next level, it is also advisable to have both parties tested so that you can avoid any worries about this once you begin to have intimate relations together.
Consider Taking Things Into Your Own Hand Before Rushing Into a Relationship
We hate to say it but while physical intimacy with another person is important, sex shouldn't be something that you rush into. This is especially true if you are worried about diseases or emotional issues. Many guys who are recently divorced are looking to simply "have some fun" and as long as this is consensual we have no objection to that.
However, this rush into sexual relations can cause other issues related to both physical and mental health. Instead, maybe try checking out something to help make things more fun by yourself such as blowjob simulators or masturbators for men.
Avoid Getting Too Close Too Quickly With Your Emotions
When you're on a dating site it's easy to get close fast with the other person. This can be dangerous if they are not as invested in finding love and caring for you emotionally. For instance, disclosing too much intimate information or letting them into your life without any demands (think of this like being their girlfriend) is opening yourself up for potential danger.
It may sound crazy but once someone has access to all your vulnerabilities, weaknesses, and secrets - they have more power over you than before so protect yourself by taking things slowly when it comes time to disclose personal details about yourself that could make you vulnerable- whether physical or emotional!
Also remember not to let anyone know where you'll be after the date until there is an established.
If You Are Interested In More, Follow-up Don't Wait
If you are interested in seeing the person again, don't wait. Don't play silly games that you may have learned in college or high school about needing to wait three days or sitting on Facebook, Instagram, or SnapChat stalking the person to see what she says about you.
If you want to see her again, make contact. Not only will this help reduce days or weeks of anxiety where you wonder if she likes you, she may be thinking the same thing and you not reaching back out may be interpreted as you not wanting to see her!
If She Says No ... Be Polite But Don't Push It
This is probably the most important lesson that men need to pay attention to. Some women will say "no" trying to be coy. Many women enjoy being chased. However, this can get you into danger with the wrong person. If a woman says no ... listen to her. Consent is essential with dating and you are way better off having missed out on a potential night of passion than spending weeks or months of hell stuck in a court battle or being blasted on social media for something you thought was "just a game".
Additionally, no matter how hot the girl might be, how well you seem to connect ... someone who is willing to play games like that probably won't work out anyhow.
So, be the gentleman and respect what she says. Be open if she comes back and wants to do more with you but never push her to do something she isn't fully prepared to do.
- Written by James Hills
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