Guys' trips are usually just something with a group of life-long friends or buddies that share a similar passion, such as a golf group or friends from work. Occasionally, though - and frankly, far more regularly than most people would think - a new guy is brought into the fold. Whether it's to fill in for someone who's sick or to split the cost of a rental house six ways instead of five, situations like this can add unexpected complexity to your otherwise well-planned out guys' getaway. Not only will this new guy be a wild card in terms of interests and behaviors, but is he someone that you can trust to be close with and potentially even share a hotel suite with for a few days?
The first and most important thing to consider here is that the guy who brings the new guy into the group needs to take full responsibility for his actions. That means not only if something goes wrong, he needs to fix it ... but he's also the one who will take the lead and talk with the new guy if there are quirks and other factors he creates that makes the rest of the group awkward. In most situations, this won't be a factor and the truism, "A Man's Word Is His Bond" comes into play.
The second factor is that whoever plans to introduce the new guy to the group should ask first - and make sure that the group is open to him joining. This is important since you don't want to force anything, and also, you don't want to get the new guy's hopes up.
So, assuming the group is open to adding a new guy to the next trip, here are six ways to stay safe and secure and set proper expectations.
Do Some Background Investigation
Before allowing someone to follow you on a trip, investigating the person is one of the most important things you need to do if you are very particular about your safety and that of other friends.
The first point of the call would be to start with your mutual friend. Could you ask him how much he knows the new dude, for how long, and where they met?
After the answers to these questions, you need to proceed to the new guy’s social media accounts and check the type of content he posts and what he says. If you are not sure how to find his social media, run a background check on him on Nuwber. This people search engine can provide you with all the necessary details you need to know about him, including his social media accounts, age, and even criminal records, among others.
With all the information you would gather, you should be able to determine whether or not this person should join the trip.
Since the new dude is likely someone you have not met or talked to in person before, the next thing is to call him after your pre-investigation. You need to strike up a normal conversation while telling him that you are expecting him on the trip.
You don’t need to make the call formal, as this is the person you would be bonding with within a matter of days. Being casual and friendly would also make him feel relaxed when speaking with you, and you can tell a lot about a person by what he says during a harmless conversation.
One of the important things you should look out for is how you connect. While this may not mean the fellow is a good or bad person, when you connect with people, you should feel relaxed around them, which is a sign of feeling safe. If the connection is not there, you will need to look into it.
Discuss The Trip Rules With Him
You must spell out the rules to the newcomer to avoid conflicts of interest during the trip. It doesn’t make sense to spell out the rules and regulations while the new dude is already on the trip. This should come beforehand. He can choose to stay back if he is not okay with how the group relaxes during the journey.
In order to avoid disagreement among the group during the trip, all the rules should be spelled out. Any member of the group who defaults will bear the consequences so that the new person will know that the rules apply to everyone on the trip.
Have Secure Accommodations
Secure accommodation doesn't just end at having a hotel or rented property with CCTV cameras. Things can still go wrong if the wrong people are in the same room.
When assigning rooms to the group, dynamics should be considered to avoid conflict. The choice and compatibility of members should be considered more than anything else when allocating rooms. Also, even if you are all buddies, you still need your privacy every now and then.
If it matters to the group, rules and regulations should be made concerning how the spaces will be used. Respecting each other's space and privacy will help to create a secure and loving environment where guys can bond and catch up on the things they have missed about each other.
Prepare Emergency Contact Information
While we all hope for the best whenever we go on an annual trip, one or two things may go wrong. That’s why, in such a situation, you should have the emergency contact details of the closest law enforcement office of the location you are going to be staying in, just in case things go out of hand.
Also, you'll need to give out an emergency contact to the new fellow, as well as every other person you are embarking on the trip with. You should be able to contact the emergency number for help in any emergency.
Be Open And Respectful
It is common for guys to throw banters at each other, especially on trips like this. However, when bantering, you should understand that there are boundaries, and if you cross such boundaries, it may result in the other person reacting accordingly.
Moreover, with a new buddy in the group, you would want to restrict the banter towards him because you may not know how he takes in the jokes. Also, in cases where you say something that comes out wrongly, be quick to apologize.
When talking to the new guy, be respectful and picky with your words until you fully understand his personality and how he responds to harsh words or banters.
The annual trip is a great time for guys to rest from the year’s hard work. It is not wrong for a mutual friend to invite a buddy, but for safety reasons, you must investigate to know the person joining your group.
Put a call to the person after your investigation, and if you connect with him, you can share the trip's rules and regulations. When sharing accommodation, consider each other's compatibility and be respectful while you throw banters at each other.
Overall, have emergency contact of the closest law enforcement office and that of every group member in case the need arises for that.