Premature ejaculation or PE is the number one most common men's sexual health problem. Let's face it - we've all gotten a bit overexcited and couldn't control ourselves. It's not fun, it can be awkward, and sometimes a bit messy. One of the challenges that we face as men is that because so much of our "male image" is tied up in sexual prowess, that failure to perform is something often shrouded in mystery, myth, and bravado. Let's take a look at a few of these myths as well as some treatments that will actually work to help you last longer.
Each of you probably has a different definition of what "premature" is. Medically though, most experts define premature ejaculation as a sexual dysfunction that occurs prior to, or within about one minute of penetration. The International Classification of Diseases definition is even shorter, with premature being defined as within 15-seconds of sexual intercourse. According to the 1948 Kinsey Report, 75% of men ejaculate within two minutes of penetration. A Study from a Belgian University showed that 20-30% of men will experience the disorder.
Ultimately though, defining the disorder of what premature means is one of those situations where the strict medical definition is less important than your own personal objectives. You should be able to control your orgasm and delay it so you can fully enjoy sexual relations with your partner. Luckily for most men, women consider premature ejaculation less of a problem than we do. This is especially true if the partner is considerate of their needs with fore and after-play to finish the job in other ways than intercourse.
That being said, there are still a lot of myths and misinformation around this subject. Let's take a look at some of them and set the record straight!
Myth: Premature Ejaculation Is a Young Man's Problem
To some people, overcoming Premature Ejaculation or PE is as simply as saying, "don't worry - you'll grow out of it". While that's a nice thought, it's simply not accurate. Recent studies have shown that while PE is common among less sexually experienced men, guys of all ages can have the problem. In fact, PE is the most common sexual health disorder among men of all ages. It is even greater than ED, something that is much more commonly talked about. There is no evidence that incidences of PE decline with age and in fact, studies have shown that it actually increases around age 50.
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Myth: There Are No Good Medical Treatments for PE
While there are many companies that sell various PE treatments and remedies for sexual disorders of all kinds, we're lucky today. There are actually some good clinically tested solutions including premature ejaculation sprays. Many of the most effective treatments depend on applying a desensitizing agent such as lidocaine to help you last longer. It works by reducing sensitivity of the penis and especially the more sensitive head area so that stimulation during sex is reduced. It's important to do your research though since while many PE treatments sound similar, they can have different results. Perhaps most importantly is that you want a solution designed for low transference. While you want to reduce YOUR sensitivity so you can last longer, most women don't want to experience vaginal numbing during sex!
Myth: There's No Way To Overcome PE Naturally
Sometimes men are simply just over excited at the thought of having sex. Other times - especially for sexually inexperienced men - there's a performance anxiety the causes premature ejaculation. However, the solution is more than just improving your mental game or thinking about grandma or baseball scores. For instance, practicing kegel exercises can strengthen the pelvic floor muscles leading to better control as well. Studies have found that not only does this train your muscles to be stronger (like any other workout) but also improves your ability to control them better too. This can lead to not only better orgasmic control and reduced instances of premature ejaculation but reducing instances of urinary incontinence and prostate health as well. Evidence suggests that not only will it improve your control but will actually improve the quality of your orgasm when you are ready to go for it.
Other solutions include wearing condoms and masturbating before your date so as to take the edge off.
Some sex therapists claim to be able to teach men to last as long as they choose before orgasming. Ultimately practice makes perfect I suppose and practicing orgasm control could be a great exercise for couples to do together.
Myth: PE Is Caused By Anxiety
While men who suffer from PE may have anxiety about their ability to perform the way they want - anxiety in itself is not a cause of premature ejaculation. In the past, many doctors would prescribe low-dose antidepressants as a treatment for PE. Today though, as modern survey are starting to show a correlation ... but not causation, the treatments are focused more on reducing sensitivity and methods that assist men with better ejaculatory control.
Myth: PE Is a Condition That Women See As Your Failure
For many heterosexual men, sex is seen as a "challenge" to not just reach orgasm ourselves - but ultimately win the prize of helping their female partners orgasm too. If we climax first then we didn't do our job. Unfortunately traditional intercourse isn't the most sexually satisfying for many women. Instead, they need more direct stimulation of the clitoris while for men the head of our penis is the most sensitive.
Luckily, the solution to helping both parties is to change up the schedule of events a bit. This includes slowing sex down and focusing more on foreplay, oral sex, and slower penetrative strokes. This will help your partner enjoy the experience more and it will also help you last longer as well.